Sexual Sin Recovery, Sex is Sacred! (Part 1)

I know that there are those who navigate through my entire site, and I know that there are those who only read the blog.  It is because of the last statement that I am choosing to do the following for this post, and for the next several posts.  I am going to basically copy and paste parts of my Sexual Sin Recovery and Sex is Sacred pages from my site.  The next several blogs will be excerpts of these pages.  I want everyone who comes to my site to know that there is freedom from sexual bondage and that God has a special purpose for sex (one that is holy and sacred and worshipful).

You can read the information and see that the principles apply beyond the sexual arena.  They apply to life in general.  Life is sacred and is about worshiping Jesus!  There is freedom from bondage no matter what that bondage is, and that freedom comes only from Christ.  With that said, enjoy the rest of the post:

Sexual Sin Recovery

The road to freedom is not an easy one. It can take close to a year or even longer. In reality the road to freedom is a lifelong journey. With that said, below are some books I recommend, as well as my thoughts on the first 30 days of sexual sin recovery and how to begin walking in freedom.

Books to Read

Surfing for God (Best pornography recovery book available)

Hooked: New Science on How Casual Sex is Affecting Our Children (Best book on how sexual sin impacts the adolescent male)

Girls Uncovered: New Research on What America’s Sexual Culture Does to Young Women (Best book on how sexual sin impacts the adolescent female)

Counterfeit Gods (Best book out there on idolatry in our nation)

Romans 1-8, Ephesians 1-3, Colossians 1-2 (Great chapters in the Bible on who we are if we are in Christ)

First 30 Days of Recovery (Repentance and Confession):

  • Read Psalm 51 and repent your sin to God.  God wants our hearts to be broken over our sin before Him.  If you have never surrendered your life to Christ, now is the time to do it.  Freedom only comes in Christ.
  • Confess your sin to someone in spiritual authority who can help.
  • Confess to those in your life that you have hurt because of your sexual sin (parent, boyfriend, girlfriend, spouse, etc.)

For a minute, let’s just focus on confession.

It is possible that you are reading this and do not know God.  Matthew 5:3 says the one who is poor in spirit is the one who experiences God’s Kingdom.  Poor in spirit simply means powerless.  If you are battling sexual addiction on your own, please know that it will not work.  Admit your powerlessness to Jesus!  Surrender your life to Christ and in doing so you enter into a relationship with God!

If you do know Christ, I think it is really important to first repent of your sin to the Lord.  When we do, 1 John 1:9 tells us that we experience His cleansing and forgiveness.  This forgiveness you experience serves as a motivator to pursue freedom in Christ.  Romans 2:4 says God’s kindness leads us to repentance.  Galatians 5:1 says it is for freedom that Christ set us free.

After you have confessed to the Lord, I think you need to find someone who is more mature in their walk to confess to.  Galatians 6:1 tells us that the one who is more mature in the Lord is to restore the one in sin gently.  This confession to one in spiritual authority can serve as accountability down the road as one is trying to pursue freedom.

The next confession is often the hardest.  James 5 tells us the one who confesses experiences healing.  I believe that you don’t need to necessarily share great detail in confession, but you must, on some level, tell the people closest to you in your life that you have violated their trust.  You then have to let them experience the various levels of anger and hurt that are to follow, but I believe it is a must to reveal your unfaithfulness to them.

Why all of this confession?  1 John tells us that to have fellowship with God we must walk in the Light.  If we want fellowship with other believers, then we must walk in the Light.  This process of confession helps one get it in the Light.  When it is in the Light, fellowship occurs.  When fellowship occurs, growth occurs.

Therefore, confession is a step to begin or continue to grow spiritually.  So what next?  If you are in a mess, confess!  Confess immediately!  Confess today!

If you are not in a mess, pray that God would break the hearts of those walking in willful sin!

So there you have part 1.


My Thoughts on John 6

When you blog, sometimes you forget what if you have written about something or not.  If I have written about this, then please forgive me.  I just feel impressed by the Lord to write on this today.

In John 6, Jesus feeds the 5,000 men plus the women and children.  After this miracle, He dismisses the crowd.  However, the crowds follow Him.  Jesus then addresses their heart motivation for following after Him.  He tells the crowd they don’t really want Him, but they want what Jesus can give them (example: loaves and fish).

I was at a point in my life 5 years ago where I was confronted with this issue.  Why did I want to follow Jesus?  If I was honest, I would say it was because of what I wanted from Him.  From June 2009-May 2010, my grandfather died, our church that I pastored collapsed, and my 5th child was born stillborn.  I did not sign up to follow Jesus and have my church collapse and my son die.  I wanted Him to fix things.  If I am honest, then I would say I wanted Him to fill my belly.

Jesus tells the crowd if they want true satisfaction, then it only comes in Him.  He is the Bread of Life.  We must eat his flesh and drink His blood.  We must consume all of Jesus.

The crowd, like us, responds by saying that this is a hard teaching.  Five years ago I was in agreement with the crowd.  The crowd made the decision to turn back and no longer follow Christ.  I wrestled in my heart big time with Jesus 5 years ago.  Why should I follow Him?  My son was gone.  My church was gone.  What was my real motivation for following Him?

Jesus later in John 6 asks the disciples if they are going to leave like the crowd left.  Peter responds with this question, “To whom shall we go?”.  Five years ago I was faced with the same question.

To whom shall I go?  My answer ended up being similar to Peter’s.  He alone is where there is true life.  He is the only source of satisfaction.  He alone is worthy to be consumed!  He is enough!

Challenge for you and me both:  Why do we follow Christ?  Do we want Him because He fills our bellies?  Do we want Him because He fixes things in our lives?  Do we follow Him because He alone is the source of true life?  Do we follow Him because He alone satisfies?  Do we follow Him because He alone is worthy to be consumed?  Do we follow Him because Jesus, and only Jesus, is enough?

Let’s answer these questions today!